The Geek Hideout

The Your Vs. You’re Rap!

I know someone like this, annoying her was sooooo easy ;)

I know someone like this, annoying her was sooooo easy ;)

Notice the lack of apostrophe meaning PAST tense! ;)

Notice the lack of apostrophe meaning PAST tense! ;)

Scare quotes are so scary that “your” scared now!

Scare quotes are so scary that “your” scared now!

Commas.. without it Grandpa and Grandpa ARE the menu!

Commas.. without it Grandpa and Grandpa ARE the menu!

Gramma Nazi’s…. I know a few

Gramma Nazi’s…. I know a few

Muwahahahahahaha

Muwahahahahahaha

Grammar - to use or not to use, that begets this statement

  • Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
  • And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
  • It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
  • Avoid clichés like the plague. (They’re old hat)
  • Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
  • Be more or less specific.
  • Remarks in brackets (however relevant) are (usually) (but not always) unnecessary.
  • Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
  • No sentence fragments.
  • Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
  • Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
  • Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it’s highly superfluous.
  • One should NEVER generalise.
  • Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
  • Don’t use no double negatives.
  • Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
  • One-word sentences? Eliminate.
  • Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
  • The passive voice is to be ignored.
  • Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
  • Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
  • Kill all exclamation points!!!
  • Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
  • Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.
  • Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
  • Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
  • If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
  • Puns are for children, not groan readers.
  • Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
  • Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
  • Who needs rhetorical questions?
  • Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

(Source: misscellania.com)

Using who and whom incorrectly…. I’m good at this… or am I bad at this? 

Here are a couple examples of things we might be saying wrong:

You might say: Who

You might mean: Whom

Why: It all depends. Do you need a subject or an object? A subject (who) is the actor of the sentence: “Who left the roller skates on the sidewalk?” An object (whom) is the acted-upon: “Whom are you calling?” Parents, hit the Mute button when Dora the Explorer shouts, “Who do we ask for help when we don’t know which way to go?”

You never mean: Outside of

You always mean: Outside

Why: These two prepositions weren’t meant for each other. Perfectly acceptable: “Wearing a cheese-head hat outside Wisconsin will likely earn you some stares and glares (unless you’re surrounded by Green Bay Packers fans, that is).”

The complete list

They will clean one for Free… sadly the other one will stay dirty

They will clean one for Free… sadly the other one will stay dirty